Exactly where I was supposed to be…..

I had a particularly satisfying guided Meditation tonight.  I have my favorites and I usually choose Jason Stephenson…but tonight when I was selecting which You Tube video I was going to use, I didn’t think about it….for some reason I chose This one.  It was the right one….it took me where I needed to be.  it’s almost like hypnosis….he took me deeper and deeper into total relaxation and then successfully guided me into working out some things I needed to learn about myself.

And then when he brought me out of it and the meditation was over, You Tube automatically took me to my next saved favorite Video.

And I knew I was exactly where I was supposed to be.

Namaste…..

There are just those people…

In Ankeny Iowa for a CT and appointment with ENT to figure out what is going on inside my head….sinus headache since mid August.  Off and on now but the first couple of months were hell until I had the guts to put Braggs Apple cider vinegar in the neti pot which got things moving.  I’ve found some other anti-inflammatory remedies but sharing only with a select audience.

Because I have to drive to Iowa for my health care due to only Iowa doctors and facilities are in network with my insurance….at least I have insurance…. I was able to spend the evening at Panera with childhood friends, Suzy and Lennie.   I had no idea how much I needed to have some girls talk until the Hello Hugs in the parking lot.  These two are in my small circle of long time friendships who offer love and acceptance with no judgement…..I guess we call that unconditional love.  I feel very, very safe and loved when in the company of these friends!

……and then there is Brett….Brett’s been gone now for 7 years.  I miss him everyday.  Today is his 50th birthday….we will be at the stream next week and the soul of Bennett Spring will bring us together again! I posted this picture on FB this morning and it got me primed for the day….the short bouts of tears.  So, Happy Birthday, Mr Hall….hahaha  you would have been 50 😍


Until next time…..

This is gross, but you will be happy I shared…

Apple Cider Vinegar with mother.

I have been dealing with a sinus headache since August.  Just the sinus headache…no typical congestion.  I’ve been on two rounds of antibiotics and prednisone, I have been using the neti pot several times a day, I’ve used saline spray, Claritin, decongestants, ice, heat, mucinix, sinus massage, Tylenol, glycerin drops for my eyes  and three doctors.  When my eyes flared up, the eye doctor prescribed steroid drops for 5 days.  I had a headache every single day…just the severity would change from day to day or really hour to hour.  I have an appointment in two weeks with an ENT and sinus CT.  Doctors assume I have a blockage.

A couple weeks ago, I read on google the advantages of ACV for allergies and sinus problems so I started taking a shot glass full with water a couple days ago orally.  But one of my natural healing websites also recommended snorting ACV with water out of the palm of your hand or a spoon.  Quite frankly I didn’t have the guts to do it….until yesterday afternoon.  It burns…like hell…but I was able to blow some….well, you know ….out of one side of my nose.  Last night I used 1/2 teaspoon of ACV along with the salt in my neti pot….it is working on one side…oh is it working.  The right side is still tight and not much moves…so there may be an obstruction up there so I’m going for the appointment in two weeks…but I no longer feel helpless.  For all of you allergy, sinus infection people…google ACV for sinus rinse and go for it.  It burns your nostrils but so worth it.
Until next time…..

Not all who Wander…..

I wish I had asked my dad why he moved two hours away from his family in the 40s.  If you knew my dad, you would understand that he was a homebody for the most part…didn’t particularly need or want friends…at least in the years he was my dad.  We took 2 week family vacations from the time I was about 8.  I think he really enjoyed the destination but getting there always exhausted him…driving, driving overnighting in Mom and pop motels…he followed the highway and I don’t think he would have considered seeing a road and saying…hmm I wonder where that road goes.  He didn’t do it so I assume it didn’t cross his mind.  I always felt his mother and I were the most important to him…and our poodle named Edie.  I assume my mother figured in to the equation?  He was married to her for almost 50 years.

I always wonder if those family vacations were the impetus for my love for traveling and taking the road less traveled.

I know when I arrive at that place I was meant to visit, I’m overwhelmed with the feeling of “I could live here”. I’m not sure “what” all comes together to recognize soul comfort but it is something.  I felt it when we found this house in a small town south of Kansas City.  I have never felt more content in my own skin…with that being said….I still find myself traveling to different states and be awashed with the feeling.  At this age and because of my grandchildren, I don’t want to uproot my life and move on but the comfort when I find one of these pillows of comfort for my soul manifests in freedom and peacefulness.

Until next time…..

The bridge

After the flood in May 2017, this bridge was closed for a time so engineers could determine the safety of crossing it.  I, personally, could answer that question prior to the flood and I am not an engineer although  I can mark “some college” on applications.  If that’s not enough, I will tell you that pulling a 30 foot 5th wheel over it is not safe for my mental health….thankfully as a result of the flood it is now only safe for passenger vehicles. 🙄

*

My thinking has always been that you don’t stick your tongue on a frozen swing set in winter, you don’t stick metal wires in electric outlets and you don’t drive over this bridge unless there is no other way out and someone is chasing you wearing a hockey mask and his name is Jason.

Until next time…..

My view this morning

Very light sprinkles this morning so we are hanging out in the trailer….well, I’m glued to my spot at the table with this view with the only excitement being if someone drives by, in or out…he, on the other hand, is checking out the other campers from his perch and just went outside to tie down the awning like the camper next door in case a wind gust or mini storm blows up.  I assume he will be in shortly to continue reading about knot tying.


He’s baaack

Yesterday we spent the afternoon in Lebanon..antique shopping at our favorite store down here and then over to the sporting goods store at the “mall” (calling it a mall is a little grandiose).

He found me this beautiful sig saur .380 with black pearl grips.  It fits me much better than the one I currently use which was cheap and is difficult to break down as well as a very tight trigger.  I’m very excited to hit the shooting range.

I would assume that after lunch, he will be in the stream rain or shine.  He loves to fish in the rain.

So, that’s it for now, Dear Diary.

Until next time…..

Bennett Spring history

We’ve been all up into the history of Bennett Spring since I accidentally found some information on the Department of Interior website last night.


Today we  attempted to find some of the CCC buildings built in the 30s…there are several of them still here and I love that fact.  While creeping around this morning, the fish hatchery manager found us and wow…..he was a plethora of information and he loved sharing it.  I’m waiting for him to send me some pictures he has of the building of the new damn in 1960.


The old dam abutments are still there and we could actually see the reinforcements in the water but could not get pictures because of the reflection.  He is standing on one end of it.


The stone bridge built by the civilian conservation  Corp.  Arches turned sideways designating CCC.


Today and then.  Then was a hotel.  An elderly gentleman who blasted  the horn for the beginning of trout season 2017 shared stories of the hotel where he and his wife stayed…rooms went for $2.50 a night


Of course, the lodge which hasn’t changed much.


And this building which has been many things…currently restrooms


So…now he is off to catch some of these


Until next time…..

Perfect weekend

The brother-in-law and the bestie came for a visit Friday night and Saturday.  Obviously ordered by the mental health angels.  We began our trip to Bennett Spring feeling loved and centered!

As happens every time we drive down into the park my heart sang with old memories of happiness and making new memories with him.  After setting up, we headed to the lodge for dinner at 4:30 …. exactly the way old people are supposed to do it.  I have hope every time we are here that the food will improve but I swear they can’t even pull off a tasty hamburger…we are repeat customers mostly because of the ambiance and history.  The lodge along with most all of the other buildings and bridges here were built by the CCC in the 30’s.

After dinner we hit the park store to check for off season sales and to scope out my future purchases.


We bought a couple of ball caps which were a necessity because it started raining.  After a hot and humid day on the stream, rain brings on the eerie fog which roles from the spring down the stream.  Fisherman actually are lost from View by the fog.


…..and when we got back to the campsite…


Namaste…

Not my first goat rope

Or not my first rodeo but today ….. put it in Perspective.

I have had a headache for a little over a month.  I’ve been on two rounds of antibiotics, 5 days of prednisone and now on steroidal eye drops.  I’m better today….it’s just a vague headache but I’m really out of sorts and it has thrown my entire peaceful agenda into disarray.  Okay….it isn’t really the headache….it is my REACTION to not feeling well.

  • He’s only a 23 pound 9 month old child who is a charmer who smiles all of the time and has a voracious appetite.. unless he is tired and needs a nap….then his screaming can peel paint from the walls.  He’s only a 23 pound baby….it’s just a thing until it isn’t a thing…he’s one of the loves of my life!
  • I killed at least 13 flies in the house yesterday and have already killed 5 this morning.  They have to be coming in from somewhere.  They are only flies…they aren’t snakes or dinosaurs.  They are only flies.
  • It is September 21st and there is a heat advisory out for this area.  Heat and humidity for crying out loud.  I can’t stand the humidity.  It’s just hot, princess….you can spend your time indoors in the air conditioning.
  • Trump is still President and the republicans are trying to take away healthcare and innocent souls are dying because of global warning,  okay…..you are on to something there….put it into Perspective….I CAN’T.

Until next time…..

It HAS to be something else, doesn’t it?

Without any forethought or planning other than marriage, I moved to a smaller town of 15,000, give or take, in the heartland.  It was a predominantly white town of blue collar Maytag workers…lots of union workers…my first impression as an outsider…kind of a clique town.  I finally landed a well paying job for the county sheriffs office, made a lot of friends, helped organize labor union representation for county workers, volunteered in the community and raised 2 successful daughters.  Through most of my life in this small town/county, my only real political problems involved going up against the old white men republicans that sat at the head of the county board of supervisors when we negotiated union contracts and my hatred of these same old white men every winter when my gravel roads became impassable.  Rather an idealic life, wouldn’t you say?

Then Maytag up and left the community for Mexico and was later sold to the Whirlpool Company.  A state prison was built south of town, crime increased which I will always believe had something to do with the inmate population being in the back yard, we acquired a more significant drug problem, I have no facts or figures on the percentages but I maintain we spent a lot of time, money and energy on a lot of lost souls whom I referred to as dirt bags….unless you have worked as a public service employee……law enforcement, health services….you just don’t know what is out there…..and you really don’t want to know.

Now 40 years later, I have been changed.  I look at the plight of these dirt bags differently, I maintain their lifestyle is the result of years of poor, broken families who just gave up on their kids and their kids, etc.  I believe they escaped their hardships with drugs and everything else to make themselves feel good in the moment and this cycle of survival began.  I understand this lack of compassion and hatefulness pouring out of  our conservative D.C. Government….the dregs of society draining our coffers because they are lazy and refuse to work.  For the most part I understand it….I don’t agree with it because I have become one of those bleeding heart liberals….. but I understand the mentality.

BUT ISNT HEALTH CARE….LIFE AND DEATH…..A RIGHT WE SHOULD HAVE AS AMERICANS…..AS HUMAN BEINGS ON THIS PLANET….especially in contrast with the billions and billions of dollars available for everything else?  Don’t we deserve a right to LIVE above and beyond every other perk in the United States of America?

Until next time….