All of this to avoid a little incline in the road?

He and his brother shamed me into going for a walk with them tonight.  I avoid walking on the road A)because it has hills and it hurts my back, because 1) I’m out of shape…but who could say no on a beautiful night…a walk in the country.  I love an adventure.  We made it down and up one hill – the easy hill – at the crest of that hill is the farm drive where the 3 of his layed in the back of a pickup last month – a day late – to watch the shooting stars…anyway… I mentioned that it might be kind of fun to walk down the path that the 4 wheelers take for deer hunting…


This was the end of the line until I realized the path turns to the right….


walking down these paths with dry corn on either side of you is kind of creepy…in the sense that a breeze blows the dry and brittle plants and it sounds like someone/something is in there…well, it did to me…not them.


winding around and around – over the little waterway with no water…the corn really did look bad…they did mention that it might not look this bad more inside the field….I just think this summer has not been good for the corn.


This last picture is about where my brother in law made the comment…we walked all around this cornfield in order to avoid the little incline in the road….



No…we didn’t come to an opening in the corn and see this.  I took these pictures last week of a semi full of tomatoes who took the corner way, way, way too fast and ended up on it’s side.  I’m always fascinated to look at cars and trucks on their top or side…Mostly because it is unusual to see the underneath of a vehicle and two because I’m just curious about everything.

Until next time…..

My daughter got married…..

My oldest daughter married her “love” yesterday in a surprise ceremony in her back yard.  It wasn’t a surprise to the bride and groom or her sister or his Papa or their friend, Kris who took pictures.  But it was a surprise to the parents and friends.   I wasn’t as giddy and emotional as the other 3 parents and this fact bothered me.    I spent way too many hours later wondering what was wrong with me.  I know.


They were already totally committed to each other. 

That piece of paper means that they are legally bound now for the state of Missouri…and, of course, she will have the same last name as the baby…but ya…it was a commitment ceremony to each other “witnessed” by the people who love them most. 

The weddings I have attended this year have given me a whole new perspective on marriage.  They have been loving and serene.  Words that were said to each other were their own words…not a church service they attended hosted by the minister.  The bride and groom or the bride and bride were  the stars…their ceremony…their love…their commitment…their words.  These ceremonies included the finery and receptions with great food and the celebratory dancing and music.  But the love and commitment to each other is what made me feel peace.

I’m excited to have a son that I didn’t have to give birth to or survive the teen years… I’m tired of the future son-in-law designation.  I love that he loves my daughter and I love him…I’m delighted that my daughter has that love too with a great pair of in-laws and the family to go with it. 

Congratulations Jenny and Justin…


Quite frankly it all started early in the day….on Friday

He and his brother had the U-haul loaded when I got home…but there are no running lights…there is a dead spot in the truck…something you always want to hear…so we didn’t stop for supper on the way down..instead we stopped at Caseys in Bethany on the east side of the interstate…he says…the man who never misses a meal…lets just get snacks I don’t want to run out of daylight.  That Caseys also has a deli…and the little italian woman who works there was new.  The good news..she didn’t know how to make sandwiches and put two loads of meat on each one rather than 1…but we might as well have stopped for a sitdown meal.  Needless to say..we hit the 4 way flashers about 20 minutes out of P-Hill and we had nothing left to say so we listened to the mind-numbing flashers click the rest of the way.

Yesterday we decided to get some shopping done…Hit Hyvee for deli food before a visit to Jenny and Jaxon.  Everything wonderful except he is starting that stranger danger thing..but damn he is cute when he scrunches that face to cry.  We decided to hit the mattress store across from Justin’s salon to get a mattress for the guest room..Wanted to stop in and say Hi to Justin first – he was gone for the day…apparently Jenny had already mentioned that…then went to Starbucks.  The coffee guy was new.  Even though names were on the cups, the next cup of coffee he made, he handed it to me…I said I ordered iced…so he made whatever that was – iced.  Then made his cup and low and actual order was next…so I had both of them and drank both of them…between Starbucks and the mattress store.  By the time we found Word Market..while actually looking for Kohls..I was feeling a little weird and my stomach was churning.  We were looking at dining room tables..found one that is a consideration..but apparently when he and I sat down in one of the chairs – not together – separate chairs – I turned to the guy who was helping us – who was also quite a ways down the aisle and yelled “Can we get some service here – drinks or something”.  The salesman’s reaction… and he was kind of a goober… and HIS reaction made me feel that something might be wrong with what I said and then I loudly explained to the salesman that I apparently had too much caffeine AND TOLD HIM THE STORY.  After an appropriate moment of laughter…LOUD laughter on my part..I realized that he still had a look on his face and I said…Was I talking loud…..he didn’t bolt out of the store or anything…he’s an awesome husband..but we giggled about it for the rest of the night…JC Penny – finally found Kohls…nothing remarkable..

One of my favorite restaurants – Steak and Shake…salad and hot dog…waiting waiting waiting waiting..he said at one point..I wouldn’t think a salad and hog dog would take this long…here comes the meal…  My salad was missing 3 ingredients…mentioned it to manager? who was walking by asking guests how things were…he had a hell of a mess on his hands…sorry seemed to be the only word…I explained I was missing ingredients..he told me he didn’t know why because he had been in the back helping them find apples and sweet walnuts.  He offered me a free shake to make it right…enter the waitress who told me she was sorry and they were making me another salad…okay = thanks…I don’t need the shake the manager just offered…make the salad to go…manager shows back up to tell us the story of when he didn’t work there, his food had 3 hairs – short hairs that were black and curly…the cooks had hairnets…wasn’t his…had to be waitress…on and on and on….said the two shakes we already had were on the house and my salad came out in a to-go container…I wish we had gone there sooner so the caffeine would have kicked in and I could have run faster!

Until next time….

What have I missed?

Having just worked through the Labor Day Holiday…my last one by the way…I feel a loss caused by this career I’ve chosen.  I reflect on how it used to be…Sundays used to be family day and/or church day. When I was a teenager, I spent all of Sunday in church – Sunday morning church, Choir practice, Youth Group, Evening worship service…and because the teenagers couldn’t seem to get enough of each other, we then hit one of the local restaurants after evening church to do what teenagers do.

When my kids were young, Sundays were reserved for family day…very seldom did a Sunday pass without dinner at my folks or his folks house…sometimes both.  There were weeks that I resented the expectation.

I worked as News Director at the local radio station during our first few years of marriage.  The pay was embarrassing low and I was able to choose if I wanted to work Saturday or Sunday.  It’s not like I got another day off during the week…those were the options and I was willing to work Saturdays because that was the expectation of the job and I thought I loved it!

Welcome to the world of 911 dispatch.  The broad view is that every day of the year is the same – there are no weekends and there are no holidays.  With the schedule adopted by dispatch years before I joined the family, we work 6 days on and 3 days off which allows us rotating days off and 1 1/2 weekends off a month.  That 1/2 weekend could be a Saturday or a Sunday.  I have loved this for purely selfish reasons.  When my days are off during the week, I can play while everyone else is working.  It’s a mind game.  Holidays are mainly a day you get to work without all of the office and administrative hubbub going on.  It’s always been a fair exchange.  But I’ve lost what is really important.  Sundays and holidays with the family.  Traditions be damned mom has to work.  As I count down the days to retirement, I question whether it has all been worth it….I hope I can remember this.  I hope I remember to celebrate everyday of retirement as a special day.

Until next time…


I’m up in the middle of the night because my mind cannot shut down.  My mind cannot stop asking why… I want to remember the last time I heard his voice…the last time I heard him say women should not be allowed in Fantasy Football…the last time I heard his little laugh while debating politics or any other polar opposite opinions…always knowing that when he was on the street, the dirtbag should never try to run from our streak of lightening.  This is totally messed up…totally freeking messed up!  Risking life every day…