This was going to be a blog about being a rebel….but then I googled Qtip

Who knew.  Apparently there is a hip hopper named Qtip.  

I have been sticking these things in my ear after a shower for 50 years.  In the beginning we used tooth picks with a squeeze of cotton between the sticks and twisted our own….and back then, I snuck them because I was told over and over again that you shouldn’t put anything in your ear smaller than your elbow.  I didn’t believe it because I watched mom put these homemade QTips in her ears.

There is just something soothing about that little tickle as I sweep it around inside.  I’m aware of the reasons this confession could receive warnings.  He told me the other day after his shower that he has never put a Qtip in his ear.

And I must say QTips and all of their generic cousins have to be one of the most used little inventions ever. So Thank you Mr Gerstenzang.

Leo Gerstenzang (June 3, 1892 – 1 October, 1973) was Polish born American who in 1923 invented the cotton swab or Q-Tips. His product, which he named “Baby Gays”, went on to become one of the most widely-sold brand names, where “Q” as in “Q-tip” stood for quality.

Until next time….

Apparently I did not get the proper ram rod stick up my spine, reserved, half wave traits of my English ancestors.  Instead perhaps In the womb, I was blessed with the more boisterous, loud belly laugh traits of my Irish ancestors minus the love of beer.  But I do love the word, Wanker!  I love to listen to English, Australian and for that matter New York/New Jersey intonations.  Because I speak Iowa with a ripple of Missouri now, I’ve found that when visiting other countries….just having a grasp on how to play charades can get you by.

A few months ago, he decided to learn to speak Spanish on line.  He totally gets it…he was blessed with the brain to not just pick up a few words but to speak in complete sentences.  I border on pride and mild irritation since he moved these Spanish speaking people into our house….they aren’t really in our house…But I find the constant chatter between him and the man and woman in the app to be …. What’s the word?  He is constantly talking to one of them … Sometimes I don’t even hear him when he is speaking to me because I just assume he is talking to one of them.  With all of that being said…I married a smart man.  I’m blown away that at 64 years old, he is still learning…especially when my last attempt at a foreign language was French in high school which I failed miserably…I decided my mind just does not work like that.  The best part is he told me he is learning Spanish so that he will be able to communicate for us when we visit a Spanish speaking country….but my heart is set on visiting England and Amsterdam and Ireland next…at least I can help out with Wanker.

Until next time….

As a child, I can remember my mom quizzing me on spelling words on Sunday night.  After several rounds, she always said that I should sleep on it and I will be surprised how my spelling will have improved over night.  It was true.  I tried to pass on this wisdom of respecting your dreams…they are part of your mental process.  There are the dreams you totally do not remember…then there are the dreams that will haunt you all day long.  You have two choices….figure it’s just your mind going insane or study the dream….not the characters, not the strangers,not necessarily the good things our bad things about the dream but how the dream makes you feel on a deeper level.  There are all kinds of books out there to tell you that if you dream you are in school naked, it means this or if your teeth are gone it means this.  For me, to examine how I felt in the dream…my emotions….and what is going on in my life past or present that makes me feel the same way.  I’m naked in school = I’m feeling vulnerable…I can’t get anything done and doing something over and over = I’m feeling disorganized.

I struggled yesterday with the value of a friendship I’ve had since my teen years…it’s not going well.  For the most part it causes me angst and negativity and it just doesn’t feel good anymore.  Last night I dreamed that I was struggling, disorganized and couldn’t get anything done….friends would sit and watch me but not lift a hand coming to my aid…but virtual strangers – acquaintances were there to lend support.  I was very insecure and sad about the friends and felt security and appreciation for the acquaintance who stepped in to help.  I woke up feeling that I knew what way to turn on the path.

Until next time….

I have a strong earthly tie to trees…especially weeping willows.  Years ago we planted two weeping willow trees in the backyard and I would frequently find myself down at the bottom of our property standing under the trees feeling secure and letting the leaves gently brush along my arms or my head.  I left a lot of sadness and angst to those trees.

My dad used to plant a lot of trees in our back yard when I was a kid.  I think he felt the trees too.  I didn’t think he would ever harm a tree; but, after my Grandma passed away, he had a large grove of trees removed from the farm in order to expand the planting area.  I was no longer a kid…I was an adult and it shook me.  I understood but I was devastated.

This morning, we cleaned up some limbs on trees in our back yard.  I take no credit…he did all of the work but I offered my valuable opinion.  Several limbs were hanging down over our deck and out in the yard, several were just gasping for relief – close enough to the ground to become a problem.

As soon as this happened.  I felt really uncomfortable.  I felt like we had just ripped the arms off of this tree.

This one … Not so much…it was unsightly

And worse…it really obstructed our view of the pond…and I actually felt like these long skinny limbs reaching out so far was not good for the tree.

If you made it through here and think I’m a total nut…thats okay…happy to confirm…but if you understand me – tree hungers unite!

Until next time….

• Who finds another place to sit because furniture is occupied by cats..they look so cute!
• When quiet is consistently broken by a cat every time it walks into the room
• When the human must go out of their way to avoid the cat sleeping in the middle of the floor
• When the human returns after a day away only to be obviously ignored by the cat
• When human is frequently freaked out by cat running, jumping and following things human can’t see
• When more than one cat rounds-up the human when it is time to eat.  Precisely 5:15
• When dog is required to sleep on hard floor while cats cozy in on dogs bed
• When human no longer pushes cat off the table because they are enjoying sun
• When human opens th window on a warm day because cat won’t shut up until he’s laying in the window
• When human must beat the mouse to death with broom because cats just want to play
• When human decides one cat a night can sleep on the bed as long as they follow calendar on bedroom door
• You’ve never seen a cat clean out a litter box, have you?

Sometimes I am not careful when I hold my sign….there are two sides….one is blank.  When I hold that blank sign up it means…whatever…I’m not terribly concerned about what you think of me and chances are your opinion and/or your opinion of me really has no impact on me during the time you are breathing the same air I am.

Sometimes I hold the other side of the sign up….it says vulnerable…what you say to me can crush me or lift me up in a split second.  I care about you and I care about anything you say whether I agree with it or not.  Unintended words or tone of voice can send me into myself to re evaluate something I might have said or can make me feel euphoric.

On the days I leave my sign at home….I’m feeling confident….it’s pretty difficult to knock a chip off my block….you may recognize this person as laughing, listening and loving….with Nina-isms rolling out of my mouth faster than I can control them.

But one thing you can count on whether I’m carrying my sign or not I will treat you with respect….let me back up…I can probably count on one hand the times I’ve cleared my senses and spewed a little hatred to someone who desperately asked for it.  But, really, there’s a part of me that isnt  proud of my self control!

you may be wondering who pissed HER off today…I can only respond that I Had my sign with me.

Until next time…..

Cheap Trick, Joan Jett and ❤️Heart at Starlight in Kansas City.  I bought the tickets back in February and I didn’t think the night in August would ever arrive.  We have  attended more concerts in the last 3 years than we have our entire life together.  The weather was perfect for Kansas City in August although it was still warm.  I bought seats a ways back from the stage this time because that damn rock and roll is soooo loud.  He always brings ear plugs and I snickered at the guy ahead of me with BRIGHT green ear plugs in his ears.

The Starlight Theater is an open air venue in the same area as the Kansas City zoo.  It’s one of those places I love.  It is comfortable, huge women’s restrooms, they sky above, reasonable priced food and drink (compared to other venues and stadiums).  It just feels right.  Up away from the seating area is a large eating and smoking area with lots of tables and chairs.  While Cheap Trick was playing, we sat in this area.

Returned to our seats for Joan Jett and the Blackhearts….but when Heart took the stage, the volume drove us back up to the tables.  There was a breeze, I could vape and we were close so when they played a song we liked we just took advantage of standing room behind the arena of seats….at one point, we found two seats that someone had moved adjacent to the big fans….perfect…

Heart is amazing.  Ann Wilson is in her mid 60s and Nancy is 62.  In my opinion they put old male rockers to shame!

Until next time…..

I redid Jaxon’s playroom over the weekend because he is going to need more room to share it when his baby brother arrives although I’m thinking he thinks baby brother is going to come out his current size….he’s anxious to play with him 😍

When he got to Papa and Grandmas house today, he wanted to play his paw patrol game in his new room.  And so did Benny and Truman…

The first game went well….Jaxon won with 5 tokens…his attention span….squirrel….was not as good for the second game and we had to shoo Benny away because he no longer wanted to spin…he wanted to chew on the spinner after his turn.

Until next time…..

Moved all of the furniture into my new craft room yesterday.  We can barely walk today although he decided to go out and walk the mower around so his muscles will be stretched and fluid while mine are seized up sitting on the Davenport.  We brought the daybed downstairs so anyone visiting will have a little more privacy and it freed up the upstairs bedroom to make it the official grand baby play room.

Still have lot of work to do organizing and sorting and hanging.

We covered the floor with large remnants of carpet from Menards…$1.98 apiece.  Reasonably nice pieces with foam backing and I’m very happy with how well they are laying down.  Used no adhesive because I want to be able to lift them out when I’m using paint.  I think this is going to be a wonderful area to double down on yoga and meditation….quiet and private.

Life is good.

Until next time……

Families…after knowing his family for nearly 40 years and being a Brown for 37 years, I often still find myself trying to figure out where my place is.  I have participated in the family drama over the years….I’ve reacted with bad attitude as well as been the recipient of what I considered to be hurtful gossip.  As we said goodbye to my mother in law this week, I had an ah ha moment thinking about being an only child trying to find my level in a family of 4 siblings who grew up together in a tight knit family.  I realized at the funeral yesterday that I’m never going to be “one of them”….. But, I’m still part of the family and have my place.

On the way to the funeral yesterday, I was feeling some anxiety because I knew two of the ex spouses would also be there.  This wasn’t a problem for me but I was thinking about how I would feel if he had been married before and I was about to be thrown together with the history of the old families.  While I believed that my empathy was not out of line, I also felt this was the way it should be.  The mothers of the grandchildren who were saying goodbye to their grandma and these ex spouses were daughters in laws of this woman for a long time.

While I felt a little dance of discomfort in the beginning, everyone was accepted, greeted and included…it was actually an amazing show of love and acceptance.  I was proud to be a member of this family….brothers, sister, spouses, cousins and ex spouses.

Until next time….