These Dreams

These dreams go on when I close my eyes
Every second of the night I live another life

First two lines of the chorus of These Dreams sung by Heart (just in case you aren’t familiar). I felt aggressive, angry and hateful when I woke this morning and it didn’t take me long to realize who the characters were in my dreams and what rolls they were playing. I realized I was continuing the fear based thinking as I took my first sips of coffee. As is usually the case in writing my feelings out and replacing those fear based thoughts with love and gratitude, it all starts to make sense and disappear.. or heal?? Each time I work through monkey brain thinking, I realize the mental flapping quiets!

The last two mornings, I have decided to take advantage of the solitude and sit by the pond on the walking trail. The sun on my back, shifting the rocks under my sit-down for comfort, the variety of bird songs all around me, the occasional plop of a fish, and the ever smooth glide of a goose through the water leaving a silent wake on the still, pond of glass. These are the moments when a peaceful meditation just happens as you just slide your eyelids closed.

The perfume from the blooming honeysuckle eventually gets me on my feet following the scent…..one of those ingredients of spring I savor!

Until next time…

Nina Sue want a turtle?

This is a story I cherish.

When I was young and very young, my dad would take me on long walks down the dusty gravel road at Grandmas. Usually we ended up at the little cemetery about 1/2 mile down the road. He would point out headstones of our dead ancestors and share with me the stories about them handed down generation to generation. I’ve often contemplated hypnotism in order to recall these stories….and to relive one last trip down the road with my dad.

Often along the road, we would see turtles and my dad would say ‘Nina Sue want a turtle’ and Nina Sue would politely say No, daddy. I wanted to want a turtle because it seemed important to my dad…but ewwwwww. One day he brought a bucket along with us, scooped up a turtle and carried it back to grandmas…..I’m guessing he thought I would eventually change my mind if I saw the turtle in different habitat! EWWWW. Before we headed back to Des Moines, he released the turtle down by the road.

Walking along the pond this morning, I had a moment of connection with my dad and a few tears..I still think ewww even though I appreciate critters and nature more and more as I age. bit most of all how I would love to hear my dad say, Nina Sue want a turtle!

Until next time….