Healing can’t be forced

I have been distracted the last couple,of weeks at home…my dreams have been angry, non peaceful and I’ve been carrying the mood throughout the day…I’ve been expecting this camping trip to be mindless and peaceful because I always feel I’ve come home when we drive into Bennett Spring Park.  But,  I’ve been carrying around some nostalgia and sadness on my shoulders this week.  Sitting at the picnic table tonight I’m hearing bits of conversations floating through the air from other campsites and I can’t seem to get over the loneliness of not having Brett and family around.  On our way back from the Lodge for supper, we drove through the other campgrounds and shared our memories of when we camped here and when we camped there and remember when this happened or that happened.  Watching him fish today, I spotted a guy in the stream wearing a floppy fishing hat like Brett used to wear, I seriously looked for Brett’s dad in the stream…what a blessing that would have been to run into the Hall family this week.  I feel like I’m making headway with the healing process.  Brett has been gone for 6 years and there will obviously be residual pain even after this long.  I obviously needed to experience it and move on.

NOt to take anything away from the fun he and I have had so far.  I love my fisherman!  This is now!  Here’s a few pics I took today.

The Bennett Spring Lodge/Dining hall

Until next time….

3 thoughts on “Healing can’t be forced

  1. I’m not sure we ever “get over” grief. We just learn to honor the empty space in our heart. The picture of the empty table is poignant.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Nina, Perfectly said… makes my heart hurt. Jack just said tonight, “It was Uncle Brett’s birthday and we didn’t go fishing.”

    We were all blessed with many wonderful memories! Glad you were back to make more!

    Liked by 1 person

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