Even after 15 years….

My dad has been gone just over 15 years and I still get that ache in my throat occasionally when something brings my thoughts into focus of him.

This mandolin was very special to him and hung in various places in our home while I was  growing up.  I’m sure it belonged to one of our long ago kin.  Also, when going through his things after he passed I found this old man and woman….I have no idea why they were special to him and why he kept them…but they are special to me too.  Not overly attractive but they have no doubt been held and/or played with by him or others before him.

While re doing a wall in the living room today, I choked up….I want to sit down with him and have him tell me about these things and to talk to me about the more Insignificant things in his life…..and of course, Jaxon popped into my thoughts.  I know how much my dad loved his granddaughters…wouldn’t he just be over the moon watching and talking to his great grandson!

Its impossible to change things…he’s gone.  I can feel him whenever I want to feel him through the things he left me and the things he taught me.  I feel joy that I am able to be a loving grandma to Jax with the the love shown me as his daughter and the mother of his grandchildren.

Until next time…..

Showers in the vicinity

What a difference a day makes.  Spring is here and I was thinking it was getting to be about time to move the plants outside.  I just don’t think they have been happy since I moved them indoors in October……but…..it’s probably going to freeze overnight the next couple of days.  Yesterday was a beautiful spring day.  Jax and I spent most of it outside..we took a walk, picked up sticks, pulled some trash out of the pond…. it was even so nice that I picked up dog poo in the yard and it wasn’t a horrible job.  Today it is sprinkling off and on with a spitting of snowflakes.  I’m trying to change my attitude to this is a blessing too because we need the rain but humph?

Chip and Joanna Gaines will be at the home show in KC this weekend. (HGTV FIXER UPPER) in case you were wondering.  I want to get a look at them in person and see if Chip got a haircut and is sweating.  That’s it for the weekend..at least the forecast calls for sun.  The temps will be a little under 60 but THERE WILL BE SUNSHINE.

Until next time….

12 to 18 inches of dental floss is plenty

I think conflict is very healthy.  I learned that when someone disagrees with me I have 3 options….a brawl, a respectful discussion or ignore and move on.  I choose one of these options depending on how important the topic of disagreement seems to be.  Politics…I usually just move on.  Religion…I can have a healthy, respectful discussion because I’m open to different ideas but for the most part, I ignore and move on.  Money…I talk about money especially where shopping is involved.  Dental floss…grab ahold of something stable because I’m coming for you!  You don’t need to wrap dental floss around both hands, string it down around your ankle to adequately floss your teeth.  I have had to stand over people who borrow my dental floss and scream in their face THAT IS ENOUGH….STOP NOW.  I have no idea why this is such an irritant for me.  I tore off approximately 19 inches this morning and decided I would just save it in my drawer to use next time because it would be difficult to tie the extra, unneeded floss back on the roll.

I have a thing about toilet paper too.  I’m a rebel and hang it underneath but quite frankly when I’m grabbing for it, it really makes no difference.  I don’t even really care how many squares others use.  But I cannot understand those people who fold rather than just crunch.  I won’t go into detail here but think about it people!

I voted.  Hope you did too.

Until next time….

My Greek birthday evening

My amazing niece took us out for dinner last night.

Tassos Greek Restaurant in KC!  This was my first Greek experience and now do I not only want to return to the restaurant but I want to experience Greece!

Live music with two very fun musicians playing a guitar, flute, sax enhanced with electronic percussion.  The guitarist/vocalist had Neil Diamond’s voice for Neil Diamond songs.

Christina bought me a plate to break on the dance floor promising good luck or at least the release of dark shadows.

and then the Belly dancer…….click on the link.


Very fun night.  Thanks family and especially thanks Xtina for making it all happen ❤️


Few things make Jenny happier than when she and I show up together wearing similar clothes….but I dont just do it with Jenny.  The family went to see Thomas the Train last year and Justin and I looked like we should be piloting gondolas

We met family from the other side of Missouri in Columbia and Jenny and I Were wearing very similar plaid shirts….she was thrilled.  I only wish we would have been in public last night when she showed up to pick up Jax.

  I think we are totally adorable…she’s never wearing the shirt again!

Blessed with another perfect weather day today……he was helping neighbor, Dave, this morning put a new ceiling in the  shelter house beside the pond.  Jax and I walked down to see them just as a loud gaggle of geese were landing on the pond…..also noticed buds on lilac bushes…and by golly I saw a hawk in a tree.  I love spring!

Until next time…..

I saw diamonds sparkling on the water

I’ve found the lighter I am emotionally, the clearer I can see.  I can remember back in the day he would be excited about nature’s beauty…ya…he can still spot a hawk sitting on a utility pole 30 feet high from 5 miles away and I’m not impressed.  a bald eagle in a tree…yes.  A pelican swooping up a fish from the sea water…yup….even a family of cardinals foraging for food….I will go so far to say that I’ve heard the song of a melodic bird and stopped to listen.  I can also remember back in the day, I heard my name being bellowed so I could see a rainbow arcing above the landscape but I had way too much other stuff on my mind to appreciate it.  I am so thankful I can now see the beauty of nature and circumstances.

We took a walk around the pond late morning and I noticed with a keen eye that the cherry trees are starting to bud.  I examined them with love remembering how their short lived flowering season had me mesmerized last year and it was worth a walk to the other side of the pond every day so as not to miss a single day of their beauty and scent.  As we made our way around, I took a seat on a bench with the heat from the sunshine on my face and noticed for the first time ever the diamonds dancing on the wind blown water.  It was breathtaking.

I have missed so much ….. but I am aware now…I will go forward with all of my senses in tune to the beauty all around me.

Until next time….

Watch those rolling stops….

Our 3rd March in Pleasant Hill, MO and I still haven’t gotten used to the idea of spring in March…uncovering my sprouts of Day Lillies on my birthday was lovely.  We got a load of wood in December and the end of the stack was covering some of my sprouts…but they were growing green and healthy!  Jax and I also went barefoot walking in the yard today.

He’s about the right age for Gramma to teach him the ways of a good Iowa kid….although Jenny remarked that she is sure  Missourians are well versed in walking shoeless.  One of those … Who has the most rednecks …type of joke.

And for my birthday, I received a warning from the local police department for rolling through a stop sign….its the same stop sign that I roll through several times a week.  In fact, I think I have a little problem with this violation….the last time I was pulled over back in 2003 or 2004 was for rolling thru a stop sign.  Hmmmm

He and I Had dinner with Jenny and Jax at Buffalo Wild Wings tonight….watching a little TV while drinking my milk, Carmel vodka and Starbucks coffee liqueur before bed.  A few more days before I get to celebrate with family!

Until next time….

It feels the same…

After waking up 60 birthdays in a row….I should have known…nothing really changes.  I’ve thought it many times and said it many times that it’s just a number….but this one is really making me feel old….last night before I slipped off to sleep, I said to myself well goodbye 50s.

Quite a difference than my 59th birthday.  I woke up in Belize.  I had been sick for a couple of days.  Before the day was over I was in the emergency room in Lee’s Summit with a diagnosis of diverticulitis and oh…by the way you have kidney cancer. It’s been quite a year of hospitals, surgery, fear.  Yet I’ve experienced a lot of personal growth, faith, peace and love.

It’s going to be a good year…this 60th year….I have no idea what will happen this year…the good and the bad.  I will just celebrate the happy times and remember that “I can do this” during the bad times.  

Carpe Diem, my friends!

Private browsing

Many of the threads weaved through my personality I don’t particularly like.  When I can name them…like the judgemental knot…I work with the seam ripper and try to slowly pull and rip the thread out.  Revenge (or holding a grudge) is another one of those totally unattractive soul rippers that blocks the way for inner peace.  I can probably put a board game icon on the spot I learned about grudges…not necessarily revenge…but for me one follows the other in no particular order.  It’s really only those people who have consistently shit in my wheaties that I want to get even with…”they’ll get there’s some day and I hope it is by me”.  A little sidebar there.

Private browsing.  I laughed out loud this morning when I got my latest Apple Safari tip.  For you non Apple people, whenever Apple adds a new feature which enhances everything good about using Apple vs Windows, there is a tip page which introduces and explains the new feature.  Today I learn that Apple has introduced Private browsing.  By clicking Safari private browsing, your surfing can be done with out cookies and without logging it to your history.  When you exit private browsing, supposedly POOF it is gone.  I find this amusing with all of the FBI vs Apple aka FBI vs my privacy crap that is going on right now.  I laugh out loud because I feel like Apple is saying to the Government.  Ok…what do you think about this….

It’s probably just an awesome feature that has been in the works for some time but coming out right now caused me to have one of those revenge thoughts.  Not that I believe anything I use the computer for is really private but…ya….so there…government…what do you think of that….PRIVACY!

Until next time….

Life as a sugar snob

If you have ever been a cigarette smoker and broken the habit, it is quite  likely you are a cigarette snob.  You notice how much better you feel, you are no longer obsessed about running out of cigarettes at an inconvenient moment, you notice how bad smokers actually smell.  That lingering odor that finally cycles thru the air exchanger 5 minutes after the smoker walks out of the room….if you are an ex smoker, you know exactly what I’m talking about.  You see a person hidden in the smoke haze  and think…don’t they know what they are doing to them self…if I can quit, everyone can quit. Uh huh…the cigarette snob.

He and I stopped at Perkins Restaurant yesterday for lunch.  I had not eaten breakfast and was feeling the beginnings of a hungry mood coming on.  Apparently on Monday  Perkins restaurant offers a free slice of pie with an entre.  He and I have  been off sugar for quite some time.  That’s not to say we avoid all hidden sugars but we are trying to eat food that is good for us and sugar is not good for us in any form.  I thought about a slice of pie with each bite of my salad.  Since giving up sugar, I have been wearing a sugar snob badge.  We seldom eat at restaurants but when we do, I’m very aware of the sugar laden foods being consumed.  I want to grab the fork out of someone’s hand before they stuff the syrup covered pancake in their mouth.  So when the waitress returned to the table to ask if we had decided on our pie….we caved.  Before I dug into the best piece of pie I have ever eaten (peanut butter silk), I looked around for a sugar nazi.  I knew there had to be someone like me sitting close judging me….someone who didn’t know this was my first dessert/sugar in a month.  But I didn’t see any sugar police and whatsmore after the first bite I felt no guilt…I just shoveled it in.

I really need to stop being so judgemental.  It is not an attractive trait!

Until next time….