Even after 15 years….

My dad has been gone just over 15 years and I still get that ache in my throat occasionally when something brings my thoughts into focus of him.

  
This mandolin was very special to him and hung in various places in our home while I was  growing up.  I’m sure it belonged to one of our long ago kin.  Also, when going through his things after he passed I found this old man and woman….I have no idea why they were special to him and why he kept them…but they are special to me too.  Not overly attractive but they have no doubt been held and/or played with by him or others before him.

  
While re doing a wall in the living room today, I choked up….I want to sit down with him and have him tell me about these things and to talk to me about the more Insignificant things in his life…..and of course, Jaxon popped into my thoughts.  I know how much my dad loved his granddaughters…wouldn’t he just be over the moon watching and talking to his great grandson!

Its impossible to change things…he’s gone.  I can feel him whenever I want to feel him through the things he left me and the things he taught me.  I feel joy that I am able to be a loving grandma to Jax with the the love shown me as his daughter and the mother of his grandchildren.

Until next time…..

2 thoughts on “Even after 15 years….

  1. I so know those feelings. Tracy is right, write down things for Jax. ❤

    Liked by 1 person

  2. That mandolin is a work of art.I hope you have considered writing down stories for Jax, and any future babies. The blog is nice, especially because he see all these memories of you and him, but even better if you also write family stories and history. There are so many questions I wish I could ask.

    Liked by 1 person

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