A couple weeks ago, a friend of mine announced that he was taking off for Florida for a few weeks. I had 3 thoughts.

• He is an integral part of a spirit book class I attend on Thursdays and I thought…bummer.
• Wow that sounds really fun….this will be the second winter that thoughts of escaping the cold will be foiled because of things happening in my life. O’ POOR ME
• Why would he want to go in January…why not wait until February…February always sucks!

Today as I sit here watching the snow fall over already ice covered streets I had an “ah ha” moment.

My threefold thought process didn’t occur because of Randy’s trip to Florida in January. It occurred because it triggered me to past life disappointments that were very real, emotions were attached to these disappointments and in all likelihood I had wallowed in them.

• I will miss his input in group was a genuine feeling.
• These “things” holding me back from taking off for a week are all in my mind and are only based in fear aka I shouldn’t, I couldn’t, what would, what if.

He should go in February is nothing but my ego jumping in saying that Randy is wrong and I am right….plain and simple….February is the month to escape…my rules