Being a gramma has helped me work through some guilt

I’m one of those lucky grammas….retired, I live close to my grandkids and get to spend quality time with them several days a week…and through the 4 year old, I’m opening myself up to…acceptance…joy and sadness for what it is…right now…it is what is happening right now at this moment. There is no perfection in crafts, there is no horror about a little paint on the table, there is no hurry, there are no rules.. it just is what it is!

During my child raising years, I turned inward with guilt because I wasn’t building ginger bread houses out of graham crackers, I wasn’t playing Candy Land and Chutes and Ladders, and while I was helping force a Barbie leg into a Barbie outfit, I was not engaged in child’s play very often……that’s not to say never. But my girls and I, as children, had Aunt Frances. she was childless and never too tired to play a game, teach us to knit, take us to movies and just mindlessly play with us. We didn’t appreciate it at the time….and these memories are hitting me today because I feel the annual Christmas cry burning my nose.

Parents just don’t have time to be a co sibling or an Aunt Frances no matter what TV or internet posts tell you. Parents are working outside the home, worrying about the money, cooking, cleaning, attending school events, doing laundry, trying desperately to share adult time with their partner and just trying to be an adult. I’ve heard so many times that we wish we would have had our grandchildren first…I understand this. What a joy to see life through my grandchildren’s eyes. To live simply and to love until your heart bursts.

Until next time….

4 thoughts on “Being a gramma has helped me work through some guilt

  1. I have always believed that there need to be women who don’t have kids (like Frances) to help babysit overwhelmed mothers. Nothing works if everybody is overwhelmed and has nothing to give.

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  2. I love being ‘grammy’ to at least 2 of the 7. they are so accepting and really we have so much fun together. the learning curve of life is so wonderful when we come full circle to realize that we did what we did and at the time it was the best we could do. i still struggle with this, off and on, that’s what a good therapist is for 😉 . but, for the most part, the healing comes in having a new perspective and being able to be free with our time and our life and our love because it is what it is.

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  3. It is simply the best isn’t it. I think I was pretty involved when my kids were little. And still….all that stuff you said. And i worried about the STUPIDEST things….Yeah this grandparent stuff is simply the best!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Yes! I was very involved when my kids got older but during these early childhood years, I just remember life stress more than I remember playtime. The crap,that we can’t do anything about now but still feel guilt,

      Liked by 1 person

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