Ear plugs saved my marriage

Many years ago when we were young and still trying to not pass gas in front of each other, I tried to figure out a way to let him know that every night I want to murder him in his sleep.  Lo and behold I was shocked to learn that I snored also because I swear I didn’t sleep.  I decided to try earplugs before we made the decision to sleep in separate bedrooms because I knew he would pull rank and get the waterbed.

The earplugs and spares have become as important to us as it used to be having an extra pack of cigarettes hidden away for an emergency.  We stock up on them….we are very particular about which ones we like…and, of course….we don’t like the same brands!  *eye roll…we don’t agree on cars, music, tv show or ear plugs.

We frequently insert earplugs when we get into bed…one of us may be listening to some dude in Vermont using an electric saw or “insert tool” at highest iPad volume while the other is trying to read….you get the point.  I got that internal giggle tonight with both of us ear-plug-deaf trying to communicate with each other by yelling.  We’ve spent way too many nights yelling GOODNIGHT (what) GOODNIGHT (oh, goodnight) I LOVE YOU (what)*irritatedly pulling one ear plug out.  I LOVE YOU (oh, I love you too) …. When he stuffs the ear plug back in I’m so tempted to yell something else.  

Until next time…..

2 thoughts on “Ear plugs saved my marriage

  1. LOL! That’s a funny vision you created. I tend to think the snoring is kind of comforting, but sometimes I find myself listening to him, then paying attention to my breathing and i hate that even more than snoring. I really need a bigger bed, between the dog and the guy with a hot internal furnace, I get claustrophobic and end up way over on the edge of the bed with my head hanging toward the window, then I get annoyed that I’m on a sliver of the bed. Cuz you know, give ’em an inch, they take a mile 😀

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  2. Earplugs are cheaper than a duplex. I could not sleep with earplugs. I need some background noise. Snoring ain’t it. Neither is dog dreaming. I wake him up and show him out of the bedroom. I’m gentle about it though. It’s good not to share a bedroom unless you’re bound by law and custom and even then, you don’t really have to. I know there are people that like it, like to get all cuddly and spoony. All I can think is, “eww, your touching me”.

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