Thanks to a Facebook acquaintance, I paused last night to soak in a private message he sent me on Facebook. One thing that really grabbed my attention was the respectful way he approached me – not plastering hateful rhetoric on my Facebook – instead he sent me a private message two liner question. He didn’t attack my values spewing hate, he asked me a simple question – then I answered him – and then he answered me…quite frankly, after the first question, the irrational psycho babble started steaming, but because I do have respect for him, I simply answered his question in 10 words or less…it was his second question that made me pause…I had clarity of the pro-life opinion.
“Should it be her choice after the baby is born? Why as a society do we call one choice and one murder?”
The rest of this blog will be in generalities and using Art’s question as my basis for the answer. I know there are total irrational right wing religious fanatics on one end and “out there” left wing radicals who wouldn’t even stop to consider the opposing opinion.
I do not like abortion because of the very nature of the subject matter. I also do not like to hear about shakin’ baby syndrome on the news. I hate to hear about the boys and girls who are sexually abused by adults and especially by priests. In my job, I hate to hear kids screaming and crying in the background near hysteria because mom or dad are on the phone with me because they just beat their significant other in front of the child or beat the child. I hate this. Do I think a parent who abuses and burns a child with cigarettes should be allowed to continue to parent this child just because they chose to bring an unwanted child into the world. During the one minute of copulation, they made a human being. Chances are they didn’t even think about the possibility of conceiving a child, but the sexual mechanics overwhelmed the clear thinking. Happens. Or maybe they are just uneducated or never learned consequences for their actions. It’s rampant out there. You, not in law enforcement, have no idea how bad some members of our society are. But these are choices some members our society make. There are two sides… ones who are sucking the life out of us and the ones who close their eyes to avoid looking at the ugly.
Point number 2. My personal belief is that life does not begin at conception and actually does not begin in my mind until after the heartbeat begins. So…while I do not support abortion…. I do support the woman’s right to choose to abort the fetus. Now there are all kinds of what if’s. I know the what ifs. I do not discuss the what ifs because every what if is different…but if one of my daughters were raped or were going to die because of a pregnancy…I would absolutely support her choice to end the pregnancy. If my child felt she can not abort a fetus, I support that decision.
There are a lot of unwanted children out there surviving on their own. Do I think these children should have been aborted. No. Do I believes that these women who had sex and conceived this child should have had the right to abort the fetus. YES. Do I think there are a lot of pro-life folks out there who are fighting for the life of the child because the process is too ugly… would they be willing to take on the responsibility of the child the mother doesn’t want…of do they just want to make the decision for the mother….would one of these pro life people change their opinion if THEIR child or THEIR life was in danger because of this unborn fetus. You know they would. Just ask a TV evangelists what they think about extra marital affairs and then ask how many of had them. Our society does not practice what it preaches…it is one neighbor looking down on choices of the other neighbor. If you are strongly opposed to abortion don’t have one. Should we be teaching kids about birth control…YES .. do we really think that people are going to stop having sex … or kids are going to stop having sex just because they are told…would you? If you are a male, you can have your opinion but you absolutely have no right to make the choice for the woman. Abortion is not going to stop…it is just going to get uglier if it is not legal. Should abortion be an alternative to birth control…absolutely not…but should it be Nina Brown’s decision if a woman chooses to abort this unwanted fetus….should a man be forced to be neutered because he is having sex without using protection or doesn’t want the child…does one really think he is thinking about this while he is in the process…In the screaming about women using birth control – where does the man’s responsibility start…why are we not hearing about the MAN and woman’s responsibility to use birth control…why are men of unwanted babies not held responsible to provide support to the mother and parent the child. They are not. This is reality.
Thanks, Art for respectfully asking the question and making me rethink my opinions.
Until next time….
I feel about it just as you do. having worked for social agencies, i understand what you’re talking about on that front too. I do find it confounding how the biggest opponents to abortion are also the ones who want to cut off all aid to a baby as soon as it’s born. Typical conservative Christians theology…at least in my experience. blah. But what it comes down to for me, is simply stay the hell out of my medical decisions, none of your damn business.
@skanickadee – Amen!
This whole issue makes me want to scream. They oppose sex education. (And some oppose birth control.) They oppose abortion. They oppose aid for poor people which encompasses young women with children. It is insanity. I haven’t seen the horror from the same angle as you but from a friend who worked in the foster care system. She tried to make a difference. She and her husband lived in a group home. She took foster children into her own home. She adopted foster children. Still the horror stories about how damaged many of the children are is just frightening. So all of these anti-abortion people need to put up or shut up. Actions speak louder than words. If a person is concerned about abortion then they need to run foster care children’s homes. They need to have foster children in their homes. Their churches need to have programs for mom’s and kids. They need to make sure the poor families in their communities are fed. And the list could go on and on. But I have never seen this. It is just all empty rhetoric from these people. So, yes Nina, I agree fully agree with you.
I believe it is a woman’s right to have an abortion if she so chooses. I agree that it should NOT be a form of birth control. Who are we to decide what is best for others?