Talking and living in Iowa

My pronunciations get made fun of a lot…including the words and phrases I learned from my mother…you all remember the whole “davenport” thing…and then the pit group name which I had to continue to explain…I have no idea why my Iowa people say Missouruh rather than Missouree…or…am I wrong??  I try to refrain from saying Oh my God…every now and then it sneeks out…it is very ingrained in us and OMG is just the same thing – we all know what it means..does God take offense at his name being used this way…now the Iowa lottery has a new game, OMG…I can’t believe the religious fanatics haven’t burned the lottery building down…  Back in my radio days – commercial radio – the guy who owned the bike shop in town requested that I not do his commercials because I could not say cyclery – I probably can’t spell it either…I still am not sure how to pronouce it is it cycle ree or cy cleree.  I finally got over realty – realizing it isn’t reality…or is it??

He and I walked over to the new house last night during a nice quiet, beautiful, windless, heavy snowfall…I turned to him and said – now this is the kind of snow that I love…which I thought later must be what people mean when they say…Oh…I wouldn’t want to move somewhere warm because I would miss the seasons…I mean no disrespect, but I just need to say this…WHAT!!  ARE YOU NUTS.  The seasons here are hot or cold…or both in one day…everyone talks about it – OMG give us a nice day in the 70’s and everyone walks around like peacocks and comments on how nice the day is.  You are either freezing your petutie off – and I mean freezing or it is so humid it takes your breath away and old people drop like flies here in Iowa.  We complain if the snow and cold comes too early and then really bitch if we go right from 25 below to 89 and say – I guess we are going to miss spring this year.  Miss the seasons???

Well, I’ve got things to do…so I guess I had better start doing them or I’ll have to come up with some long story about why they aren’t done when “he” wakes up.

Until next time….

One thought on “Talking and living in Iowa

  1. I would be very willing to test out that theory about missing the seasons by moving south for a winter or ten.


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