I’m just going to say it…..

Holy crap….

It seems this year went sooo fast.  As years go, it was not a particularly good year…but it could have been much worse, I guess.  What I mainly remember of the first few months was the ups and downs with mom and Aunt Frances..almost constant chaos and indecision..I felt  like I was on the end of a yoyo…then the trips to Mayo Clinic with him.  His health had all of us nervous but I never lost hope in Mayo Clinic’s reputation.  Several trips and thousands of dollars of tests and I think I know we are headed for blue skys…aka January of 2010…he scheduled for an adrenalectomy which will help a multitude of issues.

We only got one fishing trip in this summer just because all of the above – the vacation we had planned for August fell thru because mom died – and we began that arduous task of cleaning out her house.  Also in August, Ryan and Jenny announced their plans to move to Kansas City…seems that all of the high stressors one can have in their life were on the front burner of our lives.  A couple of months later, Aunt Frances finally gives it up..probably because she couldn’t live without her only sister of 91 years…lots of turmoil with her passing as I found out she was very, very angry with me and blamed me for sending mom to hospice.  She was in the hospital for 2 weeks before she would let the doctor call and let me know.  I felt at peace with her death as I did moms because I felt death bed connections…I am quite surprised that I have enduring feelings of sadness…I actually thought I would feel so much relief that I would be able to move on quickly…but that hasn’t been the case..perhaps I’m validating the years of knowing down deep inside that I was a normal person and they were not!

The last months of the year have been bittersweet…we haven’t had much downtime.  We are remodling mom’s house so we can move into it.  It is a lot of physical work for him and lots of mental work for me.  I’ve been able to start an ebay business and have a booth at Pappy’s Antique Mall…this is the bright spot of the year for me.  I have a lot of fun and make a little money…I really planned to use it to help buy some new furniture for the house…but I have also gotten a little more ebay savvy and having fun adding to my dishes collections…These are my collections, but I think he enjoys the beauty of these old dishes..he loves antiquing just as much as I do. 

Thru the funerals and holidays, we got to see the kids a lot.  In fact, Kate and Luke just left here to start their 2010 adventures.  Luke will be flying back to Ohio today and Kate begins her adventure student teaching at the Kansas School for the deaf in Olathe, KS.  She and Jenny will be able to spend lots of weekends together for the next 4 months and we will get to see them more often with both in the same place and only 3 1/2 hours from home.

The best part of 2009 were friends and family.  We have never felt alone thru our trials and tribulations ..friends/family have always been there for us…they have sweated with us, worked with us, cried with us and laughed with us.  My cup runneth over!

One last negative thought …I really need to bitch about the December weather..it has sucked…

Welcome 2010 … I pray for peace and love and good ole rock and roll…

Until next year….

8 thoughts on “I’m just going to say it…..

  1. Nina,Really nice recap!  Happy new year 2010!  Best brightest wishes to you for you and yours. 

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  2. I bet you’re glad to put 2009 to rest!  That is a lot to deal with, all packed into 365 days.  I hope 2010 will be a productive, healthy year for you and yours.  Btw, your daughter will be working just a stone’s throw from me!Kathi

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  3. Happy New Year!  Wishing you a more peaceful 2010!

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  4. I saw this pillow at the Christmas Tree Shop, don’t know WHY I didn’t buy it. I keep thinking about it. It had a cup of steaming coffee/tea, whatever you’d want it to be I guess. And it said “Take it one cup at a time”–Ain’t that the trueth!

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  5. Some years are good to see end. New beginnings and all that. You’ve been thru the ringer, but you seem to have it under control as much as anyone can have anything really under control. So give yourself a break, take it as it comes, enojoy what ya can and Have a Happy New Year!!

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  6. oh…that was a quite unfortunate typo…thanks Tracy and MB 🙂

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  7. Oh Nina!  2009 was a tough year for you.  But my goodness you just plowed through it.  You are one tough gal!!!I think the grief is normal despite the fact the relationships were dysfunctional.   Probably frustrating for you – just go with the flow – it is easier that way.So what kind of school is Kate teaching at???  2010 is going to be great for you!  Joy and blessings for you and “him” in this coming year!

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  8. Nina chickie it was nice to see this recap. There were a couple of things that I missed. I worry about what your daughter may be teaching at that school though Listening to you from afar as I do, the last few months you have sounded so wonderfully positive. I wish you an exceptionally wonderful 2010!

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