WHAT is that smell?

I’ve been layed up for a week. Okay..seriously I have a little red squiggly line under layed…it certainly is not lied up…maybe it’s laid up…yep…no line…but I’m using layed…

Anyway…I had big toe joint surgery last Tuesday…the doctor sent me home with a large prescription of pain medication. During an office visit a month before, I indicated to him that I’m not keen on taking pain meds….will I really need them? Well, the first couple of days anyway, was his response. To that response I now say..liar, liar pants on fire, hell yes you need to take the pain meds….I won’t belabor the painful journey I’m on…physical and mental pain. Here’s my footwear! Oh…just one foot…the other foot I wear a pair of shoes the same height….finding that combination has so far proved impossible.

So because I sit continuously in my nest.

I kept smelling something…it would come and go…so this morning, I leaned over and smelled the cats…each one separately…I smelled my shirt, I smelled the bed linens and the pillows, I reached down and smelled that foot contraption…then I opened the lid and smelled that box. That’s it. I smelled every book, every journal…every oracle card box…everything….and then everything was out of that box….except a rolled up paper towel…it was rolled up so I didn’t get the dripped tuna salad on anything Yesterday and making it nearly invisible at the bottom of the box. I mentally apologized to the cats because they don’t listen to me anyway but I just felt bad that I questioned their hygiene since they work so hard at keeping clean.

Until next time….

Until next time….

Just a hair shy of 10 inches

The last time I recall rain irritating me this much was a year ago April….Suzy was down for her birthday and we had to sit in the house all weekend because IT WOULDN’T STOP RAINING. We finally drove over to the Kansas side to a Greek restaurant with a belly dancer and Moscow mules…..even though I seldom drink, I had a feeling the Moscow mules would help! That was the weekend before a spring trip to Bennett Spring which had received even more rain so we had to cancel because the campground was flooded and I was irritable!

I’m struggling with positive personal affirmations today as I sit at the table surrounded by gloomy skies that look like more rain…we are out of the drought because of the nearly 10 inches of rain that fell in a couple days. I think this calls for some positive affirmations…quietly sending them out into the universe….

  • We needed a good bath to wash the slimy, ugliness that has permeated the news.
  • Our grounds and streams and plants and trees will thrive with the moisture
  • I lift up those struggling with wet basements and houses and businesses under water
    When the clouds part, I know the sun will feel warmer, brighter and bigger; I know how this works….
  • While I’ve been writing this, it has started misting again. I realize I need to take some action and make an effort to control something I have the illusion I can control….like the cats!
  • Until next time…
  • I’m not a bird “person”…

    Because it would actually not be consistent with being a cat person. I’ve actually only been attracted to birds since I’ve had cats realizing the hours of pure enjoyment for the cats staring out the window perfecting their bird click. That weird little noise they make indicating they are exercising their chops.

    I grew up with a dad who loved the purple Martin. He erected Martin houses everywhere we lived and also at his mothers house. In 84, when he moved to the country, he added blue bird houses along the fence row and I can still see my daughters walking the perimeter with him while he cleaned them out.

    But I’ve never appreciated birds….could it be the movie, The Birds, that scared the crap out of me…especially when I saw it in 3D at Disney World.

    But then I noticed….ahem….how could you not hear… the house wren visiting the deck,, so I decided to hang the little birdhouse just to see if he/she would make it a home.

    Sure enough.

    So as my friend, Wilma, suggested I also put out some dryer lint. This little wren detoured to the dryer lint and left his little stick.

    What is happening to me.

    Just a little glimpse into my life.

    Until next time….

    Starlight, Starbright, I had better see a shooting star tonight!

    Well, we did it again!  It was only two years ago when he and I and the him-in-law layed in the back of a pickup in a farm drive in the country so we could watch the Perseid meteor shower only to learn that it wasn’t right night.


    We sat here last night until our necks ached and then I went out again after midnight because I refused to believe that we only saw 3!  We were looking up and we didn’t blink.  Before I went to sleep, I googled to make sure we had the right night and learned that best viewing is in the NE sky.  We were looking up not northeast…can that really make a difference…and I answered myself – apparently!!

    We are going to a Royals game tonight.


    Surely once we get out of the city after the game, we will be dazzled.  At least I’ll have on my sequined Royals cap so he will see flashes of light.

    Its kind of like the week after Christmas…

    Before the wedding our friends from Newton, Rod and Kim came for an overnight visit.


    I was so looking forward to seeing them…then the weekend in Des Moines with family for the wedding and now I don’t know what to do with myself…sort of lonely.  We took Baxter and Truman to the vet yesterday for their annual shots.  Of course, true to form, Truman had to have a bath when we got home because the car ride stresses him out so much…at least he just peed in his carrier this time…oh…and Howled at the top of his lungs.


    He is totally avoiding me today!

    Tonight we have the Royals…and the stars!!!!

    Until next time….

    We are all in this together!!!!

    My friend, Tracy, put this on Facebook this morning.


    The first 3 likes were from people who have had a cancer diagnosis.  This is so true with all joys and pain we go through in life.  When our friends and family step up to say “I’m so happy for you” or I”m so sorry” it helps, it makes us feel loved, it reminds us that we are not in this life alone and love actually does help us to heal!  Whether you believe in prayer to God, or just the energy raised up to the universe, there is healing power!

    Yesterday afternoon, we finally made the decision to have Billy put to sleep.


    The decision ripped at my soul.  It was agony…when he was finally at peace, I went to the parking lot leaned on the truck and let the pain and agony release in my sobs.  If you have ever loved an animal and had to put them down, you know exactly what I’m talking about.  The words from friends on Facebook were healing..each was soaked into my soul so the healing can begin.

    But there was a little guilt.  My friend, Tam, just lost her son…she left me a message of how sorry she was for my loss.  I don’t even have words here.  Tam is reaching out to me and has empathy for me for the loss of my kitty compared to the recent loss of her boy….no words.

    ….so today, I must buck up.  I know for awhile I’ll walk into the laundry room and expect to see Billy laying on the dryer turning on his back so I’ll give him some loving.  Every time I walk by the pantry cupboard, I will notice the scratch marks where he would scratch to let us know he was up there and deserved a little belly rub.  I will miss him from the bottom of my heart.  But I will heal and I hope I can send healing energy to someone else in their time of need.  I know it works!

    Until next time….

    Empty Houses have no soul….

    We took my car in for service this morning so when he picked me up we just drove further into Lee’s Summit  to pick up Jaxon.  In my non-talkative morning funk, I was deep in thought looking at houses…thinking about the big picture…there are people and families in those houses that I don’t know.  The people probably have similar problems and worries and love….what a huge humanship we are part of.  One house we passed gave me a totally different “feeling”.  The house didn’t have  a soul – I realized as we continued on that there were no curtains at the windows…obviously the house was empty.

    This is not the first time I’ve had this feeling but it is the first time I have been able to define the emotion I was feeling.  On my twice daily walk down Hidden Valley Drive, I walk by a very nice house – very well maintained – lawn is mowed, flowers in beds along the front, curtains at the windows…but I have never seen any activity – including no lights on at night or evidence of cars in and out.  I also feel this house has no soul.  I’m quite confident that the number of scenarios I’ve entertained could make a readable mystery novel.

    I’m listening to Papa and Jaxon playing downstairs.  I love to hear his sweet little voice as he explores.  It’s a bittersweet day though as he and I are about to lose our senior cat, Billy aka Bill Clinton.  In December of 2007, I finally wore him down and he agreed that I could adopt a cat.  Billy and I connected – although at the time, the ARL had named him Mouser.  He was beautiful and sweet and gentle.  His welcome to our home involved me getting out of the car carrying him in his cat carrier – he took quite a tumble as I slipped on the ice and he was air born.  Through his life with us, he accepted 3 dogs and 4 other cats…but he was always the main man!  Earlier this year, we had several mast cell tumors removed from his body and learned that the cancer would be back.  He’s lost a lot of weight but kept his personality until the last couple of days.  He’s not eating – not even sneaking people food.  He walks away from his beloved cheese.  We have seen the light go out of his eyes.  We are just waiting now.  I stayed up with him for awhile last night just willing him to stop breathing so we don’t have to have him euthanized. *tear.  If you have ever loved an animal, you understand the pain.  So.


    Until next time…..

    I’m revealing two secrets…one word – granola and trying to hide Baxter’s affair.

    If you have experienced the effect of granola, I will not have to explain.  If you haven’t experienced the effect of granola, I encourage you to buy a bag of it and eat a lot of it!  Then you can pass on the knowledge so to speak.

    After lunch with Brenda yesterday and a couple hours of shopping At Home and Hobby Lobby for chalk paint, I was parched.  I stopped at the highway 7 gas station for an ice tea before my 6 minute drive home.  I was parched, dammit.  and I wanted a snack.  I walked around for quite awhile…in fact, long enough that if I hadn’t stopped, I would have been home…anyway…I was looking at calorie count, labels and ingredients…seriously…did you know there is really nothing in a gas station convenience store that we should eat.  I finally chose a 9 x 9 x 2 plastic box full of Kimberley’s Bakeshop granola mix.  OMG is all I will say!

    IMG_1167 (2)

    This is Baxter, Minnie and Truman.  Baxter is my cat…so this causes me a lot of confusion.  Does he need therapy or have I just not been firm enough with his apparent affection for my sweatshirts and blankets?  I hide the davenport blanket when I go to bed and it is on the floor in the morning.  He will find my sweatshirt in the bedroom and somehow drag it to the living room.  This morning, I woke up to this in the dining room.



    These were folded up in a pile in the purple room closet ready to be boxed for donation to DAV.  Things are no longer neatly stacked in the closet


    How does an 11 pound cat choose what articles of clothing he wants in a closet and a better question, does it take him all night to drag them through the house…

    Just a glimpse into my Wednesday.

    Until next time…

    Copulating Dragon flies…..cats and pool water…..

    Trying to avoid them this morning at Target was a disgusting experience…. …not only that but they were darting at mach speed towards my car – even when I was backing out they were still right there…it was some determined love going on!

    As I contemplated the strange actions of insects and CATS on my way home, I remembered the strange behavior of the cats when I got home from swimming yesterday. I took off my flip flops when I came in the door and it wasn’t long until they were rolling around on them and slobbering. Truman was biting the toe strap…I gave the flip flops a bath because I could see how cats following me around drooling on my feet all day would be unpleasant.


    I went to Target this morning to get some stuff. Jax needed some toys – measuring cups, whisks and tupperware bowls are just not keeping his attention anymore. I bought him a cell phone that looks like an IPhone…with the Siri button in the right place..he loved it…Hours of “Hello, this is Elmo” got a little old but he loved it.


    Until next time….



    I didn’t wake up irritable!

    My large, elderly golden went down on the ice this morning right off the porch in his yard.  He is fine…probably be sore tonight…but his legs were splayed out and he was laying on his belly and couldn’t get up…so I suited up and was able to pull him off the ice and he got up fine…whew…I untied the gate and let him out thinking he would come around the house and come in the front door.  Well, he’s blind in one eye and the wind was so strong that he was having trouble figuring out where my voice was coming from…finally I made it around to the back of the house and he was able to run toward me and with me into the house.  Then I had to bring Franny in..she’s the black, elderly lab-mix with an incontinent problem.  I got her into the laundry room so I could put her diaper on her..always have to offer a snack or a few chunks of food to draw her attention away from the fact that I’m going to pull her tail thru the diaper…she totally does not love it!

    2013-11-05 18.48.17

    Time to settle down for a cup of hot coffee….only to find 10 minutes later that I forgot to cover the dog food after giving Franny her treat and the cats were chowing down eating right out of the container …… not even using a spoon.

    I can hear the wind whistling through a couple of door jams…out here in the middle of nowhere, there is absolutely no protection from the wind…and quite frankly…it is irritating the *%^# out of me.  I’m trying to stay positive and realize that I have it a lot better and safer than lots of other people but I already started down this irritation path and  I’m having trouble turning around in this  short hallway and heading the other way.

    Until next time….

    I’m gushing and it is flushing

    Let me preface this post by saying the cats don’t have a clue how amazing this is…and once they figure it out…they will not understand the joy their mama is feeling.  THEY NOW MAKE A FLUSHABLE LITTER BOX.  Brand name Genie.  http://www.petco.com/product/110128/CatGenie-120-Cat-Litter-Box.aspx?CoreCat=certona-_-ProductListTopRated_Cat_4-_-CatGenie%20120%20Cat%20Litter%20Box-110128

    This thing is amazing.  Little arm picks up the solids, – water with solution seeps in cleans, spins – sends it down into the drain then hot air dries the litter for the next round.  I hate to bring up the two topics in conversation but supper was late last night because after he and I installed it – he more than I – we had to watch the initial run through which was required to make sure everything was working right…this is not something you want to malfunction.

    Kim made spice cake and peanut butter frosting – it is sitting between us on the console.  I’m going to have one piece once an hour because I want to keep my blood sugar up…I hate the results of those dramatic insulin dumps.

    RAGBRAI is in Jasper County today…but I have spice cake….life is great

    Until next time